Monday, September 15, 2008

It seems so simple.

I've been traveling the local transit system in the Northern California area these past few weeks. It beats the price of driving a car and daily parking fees. It's tolerable but not so easy. The problems that I've run into are regarding the diversity of people and my inability to suffer the vast differences between myself and others. In my fifty-something years, I've come to abhor loud noises, angry voices, body odors, and bad conduct. And somehow it seems so much worse than when I once took the buses to school and work as a young person. Something is gravely wrong with the foundation of our country, schools and homes. It wasn't always this bad.

On the corners of some neighborhoods I watch kids and adults from lower to middle class families demonstrating just how dysfunctional our society has gotten. These are the same people I once lived and worked around. Yeah, young people wear hair and clothes that make me shriek, but that's a norm for all generations. That's not the problem. What I'm noticing is more people who revel in the antics of disrespecting themselves, and therefore disrespecting others becomes an easy form of entertainment. Morals and values mean nothing to a kid who shows ill conduct if that kid dislikes himself. It's not a concern for an adult to slap a child when all that adult knows is punishment. Anger begets anger. Hate begets hate. The streets can be a real ugly scene, and it paints a picture of the lives of many unhappy people.

Obama is my candidate for president, but no matter who gets into office, I hope they can address this problem with one that seems so simple. It's said that the way to change the world is to "teach the children" how it's done. How can we teach the children when we don't know ourselves. So let's teach the parents how to parent first. It's a start ... and a good one. Lessons must begin before the birth of a child, hoping that parents acknowledge their own misgivings and wish to create a better life for the next generation to come. Don't make it an option, since few would take it. It must be a mandatory part of each and every parent's health plan.

Parenting classes should become mandatory for the sack of creating a world of functional, motivated, effective, and compassionate adults. Parents should attend workshops before and after the birth of each child. Sessions should run for several years, as the growth process for children require parents capable of instilling the right values during the first 9 or 10 years of their lives. How is this done? It becomes part of our health plan, whether it's government funded, gotten through employment, or whatever means that allows a mother an ability to get health care. Parents are then taught how to parent, and mostly, how to give their children the fundamentals that they themselves my not have received in their own lives.

This is the greatest problem that we face as a world, that people don't have a clue as to the mechanics of the brain and how important it is to have insight into child development before bringing children into the world. I thought I had all the answers when I was raising my kids, but I look back and regret that I didn't learn some greater points about parenting correctly.

3 comments:

Hazel Martin Designs said...

Patricia, I totally agree with you. I think "you do what you know" and when you know better, you do better. Education is key to breaking the cycle of poverty, abuse, and hate. Well said.

prin said...

Once I said to a room full of social work students "it's our fault as women that men turn out the way they do" there was dead silence and then they moved on to something that they could more easily grasp. I set out from the get-go to raise a different kind of man and thankfully by the grace of God have done so. It was not easy and I had help in the fact that he was my own personal gift from God but he has grown to be a fine, respectful, loving, caring boy and to that end I think I "done good" :)
as for the public transit story...reminds me of the time in atlanta when I was 8 1/2 months pregant and sat down beside this man whose coat smelled as if he had picked it up off the floor after his wet dog had been sleeping on it for a month. He was a well dressed, articulate man but I thought I would surely die before I could get off that 40 minute ride. I can still remember it like it was yesterday which is remarkable in and of itself. :) thanks for all your great posts!

Anonymous said...

you always do what you know. this is how i do things